Let behaviors guide how you feel
Have you ever noticed that certain things you do influence how you feel? For example, feeling really joyful after spending time with good friends. Or, feeling sad when you watch a heart-wrenching movie?
While we generally perceive feelings as the aftereffects of certain actions (e.g., feeling motivated to maintain a fitness routine after a particularly energizing run), a significant body of research demonstrate that we can actively influence how we feel by engaging in the behavior first, and wait for the positive feelings to catch up to us later.
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This research has important implications for daily living as it directly challenges the misconception that we experience motivation before action. Think about the number of times you decided to cancel a friend hangout because you weren’t feeling it. Or, put off finishing a task because motivation was low.
We can actively influence how we feel by engaging in the behavior first, and wait for the positive feelings to catch up to us later.
The unintended consequence of believing that you must wait to be in the mood to initiate a behavior is the possibility of missing out on positive and reinforcing feelings. In other words, if we wait until we feel confident, we may never take the first step to try something new (and in the process discover we’re great at ballroom dancing). The more we engage in new behaviors, more more likely we find ourselves in situations that give us positive experiences. When you find yourself having an especially difficult time getting started, consider practicing opposite to actions to change strong emotions.
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There are two types of activities that have been shown to improve our mood, either purely pleasurable activities such as soaking in a bubble bath or having a favorite meal; or mastery-oriented activities such as checking off a to-do list item or conquering a complex project. Tying activities back to your core values can further enhance the impact of the activity you engage in. For example, if you really value living an active life and close relationships, then going on a hike with a loved one can feel incredibly rewarding.
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It can feel very daunting to initiate a new behavior, especially when it requires a lot of “activational energy.” Many research findings support this anecdotal experience. In fact, a study by researchers at Scranton University found that only 19 percent of individuals kept their New Years resolutions. Most are abandoned by mid-January.
To set yourself up for success, start by breaking down a behavior into extremely small elements that you can celebrate with each success. For example, if your goal is to run 45 minutes several minutes a week, start by putting your running shoes by the door, and running 10 minutes several days a week, to eventually build up to your intended goal over time.
Remember, even if all we feel is aching joints and embarrassing breathlessness the first few times, trust that the runner’s high is just around the corner.
